There's just no way I can go on playing those double up sit'n'goes. Entirely too mechanic and their variance is a bitch I not always feel like dealing with. So I keep hopping around from game to game and eventually may have found that online cash games are for now the place to be in.
Been playing ~8 tables of NL10 over at iPoker for a couple of sessions, slightly below 3k hands, up almost 3 BIs with rakeback, 1.5 BIs without. 3k hands is such a small sample that I won't even begin to sketch any conclusions. In order to keep me focused - or at least try to - I'm starting a new challenge, a simple one at that. I want to arrive at 750k hands while trying the utmost to play my A-game. Then I'll stop and analyze my game, my stats, the spots where I'm leaking and all that jazz.
No other goals for now. I'll be playing live the 1,100 buy-in Main Event of the Solverde Season in December, it will be like 30k chips, one hour levels, so plently of poker to be played there. High hopes for that and will try to play my best. I've been trying to step up my tournament game recently, being a bit more aggressive, seeing more flops, calling more in position, re-raising opponents when I think the spot is right, so let's see how that works out in December.
Zero Tilt Poker
Monday 8 November 2010
Wednesday 20 October 2010
Shipaments (sic)
Well, I knew results would come somewhere down the line if I maintained the discipline and approached the game differently. However I'm surprised that a running hot phase would come so suddenly. After cashing in the Sunday live tournament I usually play in, last night I shipped another live similar to the one I play on Fridays. No bad beats taken or received but I was indeed lucky to win every race I needed to win. I don't remember one where I wasn't ahead, though, so I really was never upsetting probabilities or anything. Therefore I am happy with the way I played and double happy to have been able to add another tournament victory to my resume.
In terms of how I played, I'm pretty much happy with the way I did it. Only regrets may have been a couple of plays where again I should have trust my reads and should have pushed over the top winning a lot of chips in the process due to having huge fold equity in those spots. I guess I'm still short of having the heart of a really good player, but that's something that will have to change soon. On the other hand, I'm not really sure how those spots should have been played in terms of ICM... maybe those were good folds, anyway. :)
Now reflecting hard whether or not I should play the Estoril Poker Open at the end of the month. Registration seems to end today so I better make a decision soon. I really want to play this one badly, but it's obviously stupid in terms of bankroll. Some backers would be nice, but it's tough to find those for such a tournament. We'll see what I'll decide a bit later on.
Also had a great day online yesterday, hitting a hot streak and cashing in a lot of double up sits. Earlier today the blue line (you know, the one including rakeback in HEM) actually hit positive terrain again but slipped again right afterwards because I lost one on the bubble with A8hh versus 88. Guy just completed on the SB and on these sits this usually means weakness. Given our stacks I thought I could make him fold if I shoved and still have some showdown value if not but alas he calls with 88 and GG me.
Will try to put on some volume later today, hopefully some more 10 or 15 sits. Let's see how it goes, as the challenge is simply to maintain my current level of play...
In terms of how I played, I'm pretty much happy with the way I did it. Only regrets may have been a couple of plays where again I should have trust my reads and should have pushed over the top winning a lot of chips in the process due to having huge fold equity in those spots. I guess I'm still short of having the heart of a really good player, but that's something that will have to change soon. On the other hand, I'm not really sure how those spots should have been played in terms of ICM... maybe those were good folds, anyway. :)
Now reflecting hard whether or not I should play the Estoril Poker Open at the end of the month. Registration seems to end today so I better make a decision soon. I really want to play this one badly, but it's obviously stupid in terms of bankroll. Some backers would be nice, but it's tough to find those for such a tournament. We'll see what I'll decide a bit later on.
Also had a great day online yesterday, hitting a hot streak and cashing in a lot of double up sits. Earlier today the blue line (you know, the one including rakeback in HEM) actually hit positive terrain again but slipped again right afterwards because I lost one on the bubble with A8hh versus 88. Guy just completed on the SB and on these sits this usually means weakness. Given our stacks I thought I could make him fold if I shoved and still have some showdown value if not but alas he calls with 88 and GG me.
Will try to put on some volume later today, hopefully some more 10 or 15 sits. Let's see how it goes, as the challenge is simply to maintain my current level of play...
Monday 18 October 2010
Baby Steps
Maybe it's still a bit too early to talk about it, as in poker (and mostly everything else, I guess) things should be looked at in the long term. But following my "enlightenment" post, shall I call it, I've been at least having a lot more fun and a lot less stress playing poker. As I said before, all that really matters to me right now as a poker player is making the fewest possible mistakes. With every little decision, I aim for the best course of action, taking into account as many variables as I possibly can.
So far so good and I feel I definitely brought my game up a notch in these last few days. I'm more concentrated, more relaxed and feel able to see more clearly into each hand. One thing I somehow struggled a lot with before was that I took a lot of actions without "straightening things out" in my mind. Meaning that a lot of the time, I was betting X or raising or checking without really thinking about it, without coming to a sort of quick peace with myself that that decision was the best one to make, as far as I could see. I was acting a lot on feel and impulse and while "feel" is invaluable for the poker player, it's just not enough by itself.
Now I'm taking a bit more time thinking things through and feel more and more confident with each move I make. I'm not always doing the right thing but at least the time I'm not spending cursing about bad beats can now be best applied thinking about what I did wrong and saving a mental note about it so I can try and make a better decision the next time a similar spot comes up.
Results wise - not that they matter, right? ;-) - I'm slightly positive since that post last Friday and playing at a comfortable level. Taking things easy and aiming to put a lot of hours till the end of the month for rakeback purposes. If I break even at the tables, it'll still be nice because of the rakeback, so that's the best I'm hoping for.
So far so good and I feel I definitely brought my game up a notch in these last few days. I'm more concentrated, more relaxed and feel able to see more clearly into each hand. One thing I somehow struggled a lot with before was that I took a lot of actions without "straightening things out" in my mind. Meaning that a lot of the time, I was betting X or raising or checking without really thinking about it, without coming to a sort of quick peace with myself that that decision was the best one to make, as far as I could see. I was acting a lot on feel and impulse and while "feel" is invaluable for the poker player, it's just not enough by itself.
Now I'm taking a bit more time thinking things through and feel more and more confident with each move I make. I'm not always doing the right thing but at least the time I'm not spending cursing about bad beats can now be best applied thinking about what I did wrong and saving a mental note about it so I can try and make a better decision the next time a similar spot comes up.
Results wise - not that they matter, right? ;-) - I'm slightly positive since that post last Friday and playing at a comfortable level. Taking things easy and aiming to put a lot of hours till the end of the month for rakeback purposes. If I break even at the tables, it'll still be nice because of the rakeback, so that's the best I'm hoping for.
Friday 15 October 2010
Live SnG Tonight
So went out tonight to play my usual friday night live tournament, €10 buy-in with a rebuy or add-on of the same amount. We were like 11 or 12 this time and things started out well for me. First hand, blinds 25/50, I get AdQd, raise to 225, receiving two calls, one from a guy I never played against. Flop comes A46r with one diamond, one check, I bet 625 or so, both call. Turn is another diamond, giving me top pair, second best kicker and the nut flush draw. Again a check, I bet again, both call and beautifully another diamond hits on the river, giving me the stone cold nuts. First player - the one I didn't know - instashoves and I obviously instacall (the other guy folded) and I win with the nut flush against the second-best K-high flush. Unfortunate for the guy, but that should teach him not to call big pre-flop raises out of the position with K3, suited or otherwise.
Then I pretty much kept my stack only chipping up a little bit more with JJ, loose-aggro donkey raises, I 3bet enough to commit him, he goes all-in over the top, I call. He tables 55, the board doesn't change a thing and I enlarge my stack a bit more.
Alas, I had to bluff off like two-thirds of my stack on a beautiful floating bluff, which unfortunately was made against the wrong guy. After calling the flop, leading the turn after his check and then again making what I hoped would seem like a nice value bet on the river, he calls me with ace high and I'm left speechless. He says he knew I had nothing. I tell him I'd certainly use the exact same line with the nuts but that's like talking to a door with these people... well done, another soul read and either I should have thought a bit harder about who I was up against before floating that flop or I should have just gone all-in on the turn or river. He'd probably fold then. Gotta be more ballsy next time or just bail out entirely.
So I got reduced to less than 15 BBs, shoved a couple of times, no calls, until I shoved a third time after two limps with 44. Got called by the same guy with A9o, nice flop and all but an A had to come on the turn and my gutshot didn't hit on the river, so GG me.
Overall I'm happy with the way I played and could still go far in this tourney if this 44 coinflip went my way. It didn't and I can't complain as I'm not really sure that float bluff was a good thing to do in that spot. Ah well.
Next Sunday there's more live poker, with my regular Sunday night live tournament. Hope to play well in that one!
Then I pretty much kept my stack only chipping up a little bit more with JJ, loose-aggro donkey raises, I 3bet enough to commit him, he goes all-in over the top, I call. He tables 55, the board doesn't change a thing and I enlarge my stack a bit more.
Alas, I had to bluff off like two-thirds of my stack on a beautiful floating bluff, which unfortunately was made against the wrong guy. After calling the flop, leading the turn after his check and then again making what I hoped would seem like a nice value bet on the river, he calls me with ace high and I'm left speechless. He says he knew I had nothing. I tell him I'd certainly use the exact same line with the nuts but that's like talking to a door with these people... well done, another soul read and either I should have thought a bit harder about who I was up against before floating that flop or I should have just gone all-in on the turn or river. He'd probably fold then. Gotta be more ballsy next time or just bail out entirely.
So I got reduced to less than 15 BBs, shoved a couple of times, no calls, until I shoved a third time after two limps with 44. Got called by the same guy with A9o, nice flop and all but an A had to come on the turn and my gutshot didn't hit on the river, so GG me.
Overall I'm happy with the way I played and could still go far in this tourney if this 44 coinflip went my way. It didn't and I can't complain as I'm not really sure that float bluff was a good thing to do in that spot. Ah well.
Next Sunday there's more live poker, with my regular Sunday night live tournament. Hope to play well in that one!
Zero Tilt?
I guess this blog's title couldn't be any more inappropriate. After the last post I went on to have a most beautiful remainder of August and even shipped a $33 MTT for almost $900 but from then on the downswing has been almost non-stop, with all the psychological adverse effects. You can imagine, right?
Deep down I knew that the lovely month of August would, in a sinister and twisted way, be a recipe for disaster. Starting the month on the $5.50 double up sit'n'goes, quickly escalating my bankroll in order to upgrade to the $11 and then $22 in rapid sucession... too good to be true. And well, the bigger they are, the harder they fall right? My fall wasn't pretty.
I didn't really blow up my entire bankroll, thanks to rakeback, but I got dead close. I displayed every definition of tilt, and that has impacted my life quite a lot. While I'm not out to become a poker professional, at least not overtly so, the truth is that quitting my job and looking for other prospects as an entrepeneur left me with basically no steady income for the time being. Having a first rakeback-enhanced month play out beautifully made me believe that this could indeed become a source of income.
It is not. Not for now, anyway. I was probably riding the good side of variance for most of August and I just didn't think for a second that the reason I was running so well could be that. Then it all went beserk and I got really confused as for the source of it all, reacting really bad to all the bad beats I was taking. What I was also noticing but could hardly believe was that I wasn't playing my best game anymore. Whatever that is.
To make a long story short, fast forward to present time, mid October 2010, and how I perceive this huge downswing from the other side. One thing that is clear to me is how letting yourself go on tilt makes your downswing not only card-related but also psychologically related. Basically, what I mean by this is the simple truth that the worse off your are mentally, the crappier your game will be. Meaning that while you should be near your A-game to really try and turn your "luck" around, you are actually playing some sort of B or Z-game. Bad beats turn into bad decisions and that's a negative loop that is REALLY hard to break out of.
Anyway, I'm sure it is important to notice every mistake you make, admit all those and hopefully learn with them. We'll always make mistakes, no matter how good (or bad) we are, the difference is only how often you make those dreaded mistakes. In the long run, that reflects directly on how profitable you are and that's not something a bad beat (or a succession of those in a single session) will ever deny.
So when things derailed, I decided to look elsewhere for other game structures and I pretty much did it all. I played cash games, I played regular sits, I played heads-up SnGs (something that I will still pursue with a lot of interest), I played MTTs hoping to hit big. Nothing worked because my mind wasn't right. It probably still isn't but now I got to the point of admittance and looking to change things around. So this whole post could probably be summed up in one phrase which will become my mantra:
Deep down I knew that the lovely month of August would, in a sinister and twisted way, be a recipe for disaster. Starting the month on the $5.50 double up sit'n'goes, quickly escalating my bankroll in order to upgrade to the $11 and then $22 in rapid sucession... too good to be true. And well, the bigger they are, the harder they fall right? My fall wasn't pretty.
I didn't really blow up my entire bankroll, thanks to rakeback, but I got dead close. I displayed every definition of tilt, and that has impacted my life quite a lot. While I'm not out to become a poker professional, at least not overtly so, the truth is that quitting my job and looking for other prospects as an entrepeneur left me with basically no steady income for the time being. Having a first rakeback-enhanced month play out beautifully made me believe that this could indeed become a source of income.
It is not. Not for now, anyway. I was probably riding the good side of variance for most of August and I just didn't think for a second that the reason I was running so well could be that. Then it all went beserk and I got really confused as for the source of it all, reacting really bad to all the bad beats I was taking. What I was also noticing but could hardly believe was that I wasn't playing my best game anymore. Whatever that is.
To make a long story short, fast forward to present time, mid October 2010, and how I perceive this huge downswing from the other side. One thing that is clear to me is how letting yourself go on tilt makes your downswing not only card-related but also psychologically related. Basically, what I mean by this is the simple truth that the worse off your are mentally, the crappier your game will be. Meaning that while you should be near your A-game to really try and turn your "luck" around, you are actually playing some sort of B or Z-game. Bad beats turn into bad decisions and that's a negative loop that is REALLY hard to break out of.
Anyway, I'm sure it is important to notice every mistake you make, admit all those and hopefully learn with them. We'll always make mistakes, no matter how good (or bad) we are, the difference is only how often you make those dreaded mistakes. In the long run, that reflects directly on how profitable you are and that's not something a bad beat (or a succession of those in a single session) will ever deny.
So when things derailed, I decided to look elsewhere for other game structures and I pretty much did it all. I played cash games, I played regular sits, I played heads-up SnGs (something that I will still pursue with a lot of interest), I played MTTs hoping to hit big. Nothing worked because my mind wasn't right. It probably still isn't but now I got to the point of admittance and looking to change things around. So this whole post could probably be summed up in one phrase which will become my mantra:
IN POKER, DO NOT BE RESULTS-ORIENTED
Something we often fail to understand is that poker is such a beautiful game that skill, luck and results usually do NOT go hand-in-hand. This basically means that you don't win (or cash) every time you play your best game and the inverse is also true, accounting for all the donks who still haven't figured out how bad they really are because they ran hot for a while and cashed a couple of times. Being "results-oriented" means that whatever results you obtain over a period of time or in a single tournament/session are the barometer of how you feel about it. You win, you feel great and energized, ready for the next tourney, sometimes infatuated to the point of thinking you really crush at this game. You lose, you feel like shit because you probably went out with a huge sick sick sick beat, some donkey sent you to the rail after hitting his two-outer on the river after calling pre-flop and two streets of value with 75 offsuit.
But wait a second. How well did you play that hand? How well did you play every hand against that particular donkey? In fact, how well did you play every hand in that whole tournament? How well have you playing these past few weeks as a whole? Come to think of it...
But wait a second. How well did you play that hand? How well did you play every hand against that particular donkey? In fact, how well did you play every hand in that whole tournament? How well have you playing these past few weeks as a whole? Come to think of it...
HOW MANY GOOD DECISIONS HAVE YOU MADE LATELY?
It all boils down to this: if you haven't been near or at the top of your game, you cannot complain about a bad beat ruining it all for you. And besides, bad beats happen and either nothing is rigged or everything is rigged. Either way, gotta learn to live with it. And the better you live around bad beats and donkfests, the better you'll be in the long run. And that's where you want to do great: in the long run. Only by forgetting about results and focusing entirely on how well you play and how many "best decisions" you are making, can you be profitable and evolve as a poker player. Couple that with a lot of positive thinking and... results will then come naturally. So many (successful) people have said all this I'm saying, that the whole world cannot be wrong, really.
So I'm back where I started right after I got my rakeback deal: at the $5.50 double up sit'n'goes. It is true that where I play the field has definitely evolved, meaning the fish/shark ratio is becoming less and less favorable. But it's even more true that when my downswing began and all hell broke loose, I started playing awfully bad, never looking even to the mid-term. I got entirely too busy going crazy over the bad beats I was receiving.
I'm doing the utmost to cease being results-oriented not only in terms of each tourney, but also in terms of each session, each day, each week, even each month. Results are obviously important but in this particular game they are only really important in the (very) long run. And that kind of results will certainly come naturally if I play the closest I can to my A-game every tourney, every session, every day, every week, every month. Only peace of mind, study and reflection over past mistakes can help me achieve that.
It would be pretty to say that after this huge downswing I've arrived a better player on the other side. I won't say that, as I have no reason to believe that is already the case. But what I do believe is that I definitely walked the path necessary to become a better player from now on.
It all boils down to this: if you haven't been near or at the top of your game, you cannot complain about a bad beat ruining it all for you. And besides, bad beats happen and either nothing is rigged or everything is rigged. Either way, gotta learn to live with it. And the better you live around bad beats and donkfests, the better you'll be in the long run. And that's where you want to do great: in the long run. Only by forgetting about results and focusing entirely on how well you play and how many "best decisions" you are making, can you be profitable and evolve as a poker player. Couple that with a lot of positive thinking and... results will then come naturally. So many (successful) people have said all this I'm saying, that the whole world cannot be wrong, really.
So I'm back where I started right after I got my rakeback deal: at the $5.50 double up sit'n'goes. It is true that where I play the field has definitely evolved, meaning the fish/shark ratio is becoming less and less favorable. But it's even more true that when my downswing began and all hell broke loose, I started playing awfully bad, never looking even to the mid-term. I got entirely too busy going crazy over the bad beats I was receiving.
I'm doing the utmost to cease being results-oriented not only in terms of each tourney, but also in terms of each session, each day, each week, even each month. Results are obviously important but in this particular game they are only really important in the (very) long run. And that kind of results will certainly come naturally if I play the closest I can to my A-game every tourney, every session, every day, every week, every month. Only peace of mind, study and reflection over past mistakes can help me achieve that.
It would be pretty to say that after this huge downswing I've arrived a better player on the other side. I won't say that, as I have no reason to believe that is already the case. But what I do believe is that I definitely walked the path necessary to become a better player from now on.
Friday 13 August 2010
Getting Some of It Back
Took a 24hr break and as I predicted, this rest would do good things for my game. As I don't have much time to play today, due to other activities in my life I've only played 5 sits but got back 86% of what I lost yesterday over 30 sits. This brings us to the current cumulative numbers for this month:
2010/08/01 - 2010/08/12
#SnGs: 240
ROI%: 8.2
ITM%: 55.0
Winnings (without rb): $149.50
Winnings (with rb): $241
2010/08/01 - 2010/08/12
#SnGs: 240
ROI%: 8.2
ITM%: 55.0
Winnings (without rb): $149.50
Winnings (with rb): $241
Thursday 12 August 2010
Houston We Have a Problem
Negative day, which is to be expected sometimes, right? Took a shot at $22 and despite breaking even in a about dozen sits, decided to fall back to $11 for now. Found the field to be rougher than $11 after all and having a big enough bankroll is only half of what you should considering for going up levels. You should also bring your game up and I was not feeling comfortable there yet. I prefer to go back if and when I grow my bankroll a little more so I can be more comfortable playing there.
Reasons for this negative I feel are not so much about luck, but rather me being a little tired and making mistakes. These can be costly on turbo sits of this nature and I feel when I focused and rested, it's a totally different game and very different results. So I've decided to let it rest for a bit and pick it up again somewhere tomorrow, perhaps a good 24 hours from now.
Time for numbers.
2010/08/01 - 2010/08/12
#SnGs: 235
ROI%: 7.0
ITM%: 54.5
Winnings (without rb): $125
Winnings (with rb): $223
Reasons for this negative I feel are not so much about luck, but rather me being a little tired and making mistakes. These can be costly on turbo sits of this nature and I feel when I focused and rested, it's a totally different game and very different results. So I've decided to let it rest for a bit and pick it up again somewhere tomorrow, perhaps a good 24 hours from now.
Time for numbers.
2010/08/01 - 2010/08/12
#SnGs: 235
ROI%: 7.0
ITM%: 54.5
Winnings (without rb): $125
Winnings (with rb): $223
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